Cougartown

Hulk Hogan's ex-wife has got engaged to her 21-year-old lover.

She is 50 and has been dating him for 2 years, which means they started seeing each other when he was 19. I take my hat off to her - and for that matter, to him. Perhaps he is after her money (if she has any) and is a total loser like her daughter believes - or perhaps they genuinely love and care for each other. Whatever the story, this May to December romance has bolstered my spirits a little. I promised a while back that I would watch Cougartown and give you my opinion. For a while there I really enjoyed the programme, but that was back when she was dating younger men. At present she is going out with a guy who seems only slightly younger than her. Don't get me wrong, it is a very funny programme, and I understood from the first episode that the Cougar part refers to the name of their town's football team - but I find the woman known to the main characters who truly is a Cougar. She rocks.

You probably want an update on my conquests. Well I am not going to give you one - because there is nothing to tell. But just so you can be happy, I will tell you a tale from my not so distant past - about the Longroom. Man, that place should be renamed Cougartown, I tell ya. If a Cougar can't find a young man to bed in there, she needs to retire. Last year a friend of the same age and I hit the Longroom after a night of drinking. She wanted to go home, I wanted to go on the prowl. So we compromised, and did what I wanted.

We had just walked in the door when we were pounced upon by boys, boys, boys. They were everywhere - sidling up to us on the dancefloor, talking to us at the bar, bold facedly grabbing our arses. It was delightful! Except most of the boys we spoke to would admit to having a girlfriend or partner, and we don't go for that. (One said 'but she lives in Japan and I haven't seen her in two months, so it's okay'. No it isn't buddy, plenty more boys in the bar.)

My mate got talking to a young chap drinking by himself (he insisted he had friends in the bar!) who we shall call Flannel, cos he was wearing it. But as she was talking to him, he would lean forward to stare at me, which I found very flattering. The rest is a bit hazy, but from what I can recollect, I invited him home, and because we all got into a cab together, he thought he was getting both of us. I put him straight, and asked him if he still wanted to come. He told me he was 28, turned out to be 25 - not that I minded. I think he was trying to up his age because he found out how old I was - but I would have taken him home anyway. Fun was had. Later he asked for my number, which I gave him, and asked if I wanted his. I said no. He caught a cab. Later that morning I found massive love bites on my neck. What is it about young men giving love bites? Lucky there was no work that day or I would have to ask Twink to bring a scarf in (it was high summer, I could not have made a turtleneck work.)

Needless to say I never heard from him, but that was fine by me. The Longroom will still be there when I am ready to dive in again.

Cougar x